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I have moments of intellect. I'm confident. I'm a good listener. If I were a butler my name would be Cadberry Wellington. I don't have much ambition. It's very hard to disappoint me. I've found recently that my face is not very symmetrical. Of all the puddings in the pudding family I prefer rice pudding. I don't believe in chimps. They are godless marauding killing machines. I don't believe in mustaches. If life deals me lemons I make lemonade then throw it in the eyes of life and tell her she should have given me the oranges I asked for in the first place. I've never killed a man. I am better than average at movie trivia. I snap my fingers using only my thumb and index fingers. I have one crown tooth. I prefer my toast burnt. I am the best friend that you have. I suck at sports but I'm great at talking trash. I throw a wonderful sucker punch. And one day i will be a legend, in my own mind.